With many couples, sexual intimacy is frequent and can be very intense at the beginning of the relationship. But after time, some couples may experience a decrease in their sexual connection to the point where one or both partners could be avoiding sex. There can be many reasons for this. The following are some of the most common:

Erectile/ejaculation difficulty is something all men will experience at some point in their lives. This can be caused by physiological, mental, or relationship issues. Regardless of the reason, the awkward experience of losing an erection can become a source of future anxieties. Many men begin to fear there may be something wrong with them. In fact, the very worry of another occurrence can create a self-fulfilling cycle. As the difficulty continues, men may start to avoid sexual contact, and develop sexual performance anxiety.

Vaginal pain is another common reason for avoiding sex. Vaginal pain can happen for multiple reasons. Some to mention are past sexual trauma, anxiety, yeast infections, menopause, and endometriosis. Even medications, such as allergy pills, can reduce the amount of lubrication produced and cause soreness and dryness. Sometimes the pain can be temporary or chronic. Regardless, it is very distressful to be in pain and/or see your partner in pain during sex.

Inability to orgasm is another reason couples may avoid sex. It is also called anorgasmia. In women, this is when she finds it difficult to achieve an orgasm while aroused even after stimulation and vaginal lubrication. Emotional or psychological reasons for this difficulty can include depression, stress, guilt, shyness, anxiety, and relationship issues.  For men, delayed ejaculation is a delay in orgasm or complete inability to climax. The causes are often psychological such as stress, anger, pressure, depression, and/or certain fears in the relationship.

Sex is an important part of a healthy relationship, as it bonds couples through physical intimacy. If your sex life is affected by any of these conditions, talk about it with your partner. Also, don’t hesitate to contact Center For Change & Well-Being for an appointment.